Watermelon Pregnancy

Flesh-flavored bubblegum
Chewed to forget
The fruit I bore bare
In the boredom of 9pm
Or the way you thought my clit was cute

Disgust in the way I looked at you
Gave you cursed evil eye and vomited
Back up the spit and cum you delivered
Me at my taking
I still smell you three hours in
Three days removed

Do you want to fuck
My dead body too?
Make love to Crayola Corpse Blue while
My cadaver expels shit / piss / blood / gas
All yellow / gray / maggots
Will you enjoy
The familiarity of stiff limbs?

Finger the opening
Where blade met back
That familiar warm sticky iron like
Bleeding pussy you were so afraid of
Come drink the wine of your mother
The one that birthed you from the depths of
Fallen bellies / Split open like pregnancy watermelon /
Seedless and scathing

 

my exorcism

i fed the demon / blood and neosporin / i prayed for it to go away / the intimate sting of rejection / it demands / my dry attention still / i never noticed / the blueness of my hair when wet / the lavender of my bitten nails / in the cold / the sallowness of my skin / in bruised hues / my eyes in aubergine halo

the gore of my broken / heart is sickening / my stomach is a plane / trapped in turbulence / i’ve put all my energy into starving myself / will you think i’m pretty when / i can hold hands with my ribs / or do you like the bread of my stomach / warm and tan / rolls of flesh and flour / stare down past the bakery to my thighs / marked with cocaine stripes / the new edition looks nice / try to admire the massacre / like the way i feel / a slab of meat on a steel table / in clinical winter white / the old me / lynched from my big toe

i fed the angel / laughter and green tea / i prayed for it to stay / but my reasons weren’t good enough / i am desperate to sink / like a blood clot anchor / let me be one with the deep / let the ocean wrap its arms around my lungs / fill me up with that shimmering blue

Jenna Velez is a queer poet from suburban Philadelphia. Her work has been featured in yell/shout/scream journal and Rising Phoenix Review. She tweets @northernbruja and can be found at jennavelez.weebly.com.

Image: Bitten hanging finger fruit by Broo_am (Creative Commons)